Sunday Night Ramblings

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Saturday Night Ramblings

It was a typical Saturday night with me and couple of my friends hanging out at one of the numerous watering holes that dot south Mumbai when one of them suggested that we play teen patti. Six of us assembled at Gary’s place. The minimum amount to start with is a princely sum of hundred and fifty rupees. We used matchsticks as counters. The wooden one costs ten rupees and the wax ones cost two. The game started off fine and I made some and lost some in the process. After a couple of beers, some slices of pizza, and a lot of bad luck, I was left with just one wax stick. It was quite a shock to see all your money gone and have no idea how that happened. I was seriously thinking of buying in again when it was decided to end the game soon. As tradition demands it, we always end our game with a variation called In-Out. A very simple variation with a high risk return framework. It works like this: All of us have to put in the minimum two rupees to be part of the game. Three cards will be dealt to each player. On the count of three, all of us declare, simultaneously, whether we want to be in the game or not. Say three guys are in. One would win and other two would lose. The losers have to put in an amount equal what’s already there on the board. That would be twelve rupees each and now there is twenty four rupees for the taking. The second round would continue with this money on board and the game goes on till there is only one guy who decides to be in the game.

In the first round two guys were in. I didn’t want take any risk so I sat out. Now there is twelve rupees on the board again, courtesy the loser of the first round. I got a decent hand in the second round and I decided to be in. I had competition from one guy. My hand was really good and I won that round. From zero to twelve. That’s infinite returns! Not that bad, eh? The third round started with twelve rupees on the board again. Junta weren’t taking any risks. I got another decent hand and was sure I would win this time. I was in for the third round. Luck was on my side. So thought four other guys. Damn! I lost the hand and I was back to zero again. A couple of rounds later, there was now 150/- on the board. The game was getting exciting now. If I went in and lost the hand, I will have to pay 150/- and I was bankrupt by then. The cards were dealt. It was a decent hand but not worth losing 150/-. I was out and so did the remaining five. I was cursing myself for not going in. I knew no one would go for such a high stake. It was such a golden opportunity that I let go. I was thinking if only I didn’t drink so much!

Next round. One hundred and fifty rupees on the board. In the previous round, no one made a go for it. You can imagine what each one of us was thinking. KC was counting. One. My hand was quivering. Will it be thumbs up or down? Two. There was a slight hesitation from the guy sitting on my right. Three! Thumbs down. Two other guys went in. It was a close call. I would have lost miserably had I been in. Next round: one hundred and fifty on the table again. I got a pair. Not great cards but this is my chance to recoup all that I lost. I decided to go in. This was my best chance. It was like double or nothing. One. I took a deep breath. Two. I took a quick look at the other five faces. Three. Thumbs up. One more guy was in. We decided to display one card each. I began.

Two of hearts.

Two of spades.

Five of clubs.

Three of diamonds.

My heart sank for a moment. What if the next card is an ace or a four? I am so screwed.

Five of hearts.

His final card comes off. Slowly. Too slow for my liking, I would say.

Two of clubs.

Ah! He was shooting with a two pair and I got a five pair. I am back baby. I got my one hundred and fifty rupees back. I chilled out after that. The game got over in another few rounds. I was even. No loss. No gain. Even Steven.

I know it’s no Casino Royale. But for something real, it was total paisa vasool! Literally ;)

The name’s God.

SaiptheGod

Friday Night Ramblings

A new initiative for global peace. Global Orgasm.

It’s “Make War, Not Love”. Literally!

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Boss says,” I made some comments on the presentation. Why don’t you take a look and turn around quickly?”

Yeah, should I bend over too?

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When you empty your wallet and buy the last bottle of chilled beer from the retailer, you know that life’s good.

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When you empty the bottle and hit the bed knowing that you need not set the alarm for tomorrow, you know that life’s just got better.

Amazing Post by Greatbong.
On our very own Himesssssh :) Hilarious!

Jerry does it again

One of the best pieces by Jerry Seinfeld. Awesome-o !!

I swear, I have absolutely no idea what women are thinking. I don't get it, OK? I, I, I admit, I, I'm not getting the signals. I am not getting it! Women, they're so subtle, their little.. everything they do is subtle.. men are not subtle, we are obvious. Women know what men want, men know what men want, what do we want? We want women, that's it! It's the only thing we know for sure, it really is: we want women. How do we get them? Oh, we don't know 'bout that, we don't know. The next step after that we have no idea. This is why you see men honking car-horns, yelling from construction sites. These are the best ideas we've had so far.. The car-horn-honk, is that a beauty? Have you seen men doing this? What is this? The man is in the car, the woman walks by the front of the car, he honks. This man is out of ideas. The amazing thing is, that we still get women, don't we. Men, I mean, men are with women. You see men with women. How are men getting women, many people wonder. Let me tell you a little bit about our organization. Where ever women are, we have a man working on the situation right now. Now, he may not be our best man, OK, we have a lot of areas to cover, but someone from our staff is on the scene. That's why, I think, men get frustrated, when we see women reading articles, like: "Where to meet men?". We're here, we are everywhere. We're honking our horns to serve you better.

Vivaah

Barjatya claims that the movie is about the journey from engagement to wedding.

In national interest, I hope it is an extremely short journey. Read, rather see, what Deepak thinks about this.

Oye Barjatya Buddy, perchance you read that the journey is more important than the destination. I am telling you, it's whole load of bull crap. Get these two married and pack them off to their honeymoon before one can say "I do". They will be happy, we will be happy and maybe, maybe this is the only way you can make some money.

There is enough pain in this world as such. Why dont you and KJo take a hike to Himalayas? One of you is definitely gonna enjoy it. Then you can make a movie on the lines of Brokeback Mountain. Now that's a journey which many would enjoy!

Swaaaha.

Knock Knock.

Who is it?

Doc.. Doc.. [Background Music. Don Theme]






Popular Quotes:

Mujhko pehchaan lo..mein hu Doc.

Doc ko beer pilana mushkil hi nahi, namumkeen hai.

Doc ko give up maarne ke liye 13 log wait kar rahe hain. But Doc never gives up. Mind you, AB.